Even with COPD, I can help others ensure their needs are met
Paying it forward with the currency of care
I’ve recently been reflecting on how Maslow’s hierarchy of needs intersects with chronic illness, moderate means, and the dignity of helping others. I’m doing so through the lens of my chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) and the relationship that I’ve built with the young man who helps me with my yard work.
According to Maslow’s hierarchy, our basic physiological needs are at the bottom of the pyramid, and our self-actualization needs are at the top. I believe I should be at the pinnacle and be able to help others reach this point, too. However, COPD has caused me to reassess my position. That’s because the need for oxygen is at the bottom of the pyramid, yet I must work daily to secure it.
COPD has taught me that breath is not a given but a daily negotiation. I’ve learned how to manage my oxygen, rest wisely, and nourish myself intentionally. These lessons are hard-earned, and they form the base of my pyramid. But they are also gifts I can pass on through writing, conversation, and the way I live.
A different kind of currency
Although I must spend time each day addressing my basic needs, I feel I have much to offer and can help others meet needs that are higher on the pyramid. Some people leave fortunes to worthy causes, but in the case of the young man who helps me, I’m able to offer him what I have learned as well as a modest amount of money. It is rooted in something more profound than charity: the belief that knowledge, presence, and mutual care are currencies of their own.
Once our basic needs are secured, the next level of need is a sense of safety, predictability, and the quiet assurance that tomorrow will resemble today. For him, safety means fixing a roof. For me, it means knowing I can help. The small amount I offer is not just financial; it is stabilizing. It’s a way of saying, “You matter. Your home matters. Your future matters.” And in that exchange, I feel safer, too, as I remember the people who helped me when I needed them most.
But safety is not enough. We are wired for connection; for the glance, the wave, the shared weather report. This is the next level of the pyramid. In the spaces where help becomes a relationship, I find belonging in the quiet choreography of mutual respect. This young man helps me with what I can no longer do. I help him with what he is trying to build. It is not transactional. It is relational.
To belong is to be esteemed — the fourth level of need. In this season of life, I find esteem not in accolades but in contribution. In the act of giving, I affirm my place in the world as someone who continues to shape it. COPD may have narrowed my airways, but it has widened my lens.
So I climb, not toward perfection, but toward presence. For me, self-actualization is not a distant summit but a daily practice. It is the breath after a well-placed metaphor, the quiet sigh of knowing I am helping. So it begins again — because once we reach that place, we start to give and fulfill others’ needs. We’re repairing not just our own lives, but the lives around us, too.
Note: COPD News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of COPD News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.
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